September 13, 2009

Les Miserables



The girls have been in school one full week now. Plenty of orientation, really nice kids, lots of paperwork, etc. Imagine my surprise when, during the first orientation, the Headmistress put up a slide that said:



Adaptation = Immersion.



That's funny, because I thought adaptation meant, well, adaptation. My bad. Each of my trusting children has been tossed into a class where the teacher speaks only French. That might not be so bad if the French were said slowly and consisted of phrases like, "Hello, my name is Mme. So and So. This is a book. This is an orange. This is a blackboard."



No. Their teachers are saying things like:



"AttheheightofitspowertheOttomanEmpirespannedthreecontinentsnowitstimefororganicchemistrywhycan'tyou keepup?"



And that's just Erin's third grade teacher.



About halfway through last week, Erin was writing in her journal and she asked how to spell "miserable." That about covers it. Looking for options.







The Exchange Rate



A friend gave me some excellent advice before we arrived in Paris, which was to pretend that the dollar-euro exchange rate is 1:1. In other words, if you think about how much everything costs in dollars, you'll drive yourself crazy. Just a little sampler of prices:



Curling iron: 40 Euros (about $57)

Blowdryer: 60 Euros (about $86)



Pair of Gap Jeans: 49 Euros (about $70)

Pair of French jeans: 60 Euros ($86)



Iron: 40 Euros



Kids shoes: I can't even tell you since Rob is reading this.





We had to figure out what to do about allowance. I decided to absorb the impact of the US trade deficit on the dollar and give the kids the same allowance in Euros as they were getting in dollars. One of the downsides of being an economist. Of course, each child reacts differently to the news.



Since a very early age, Megan has lived by the motto: "if you have it, spend it. If you don't have it, borrow it and spend it." Boesky, Milliken, Megan. Her creditworthiness is now roughly equivalent to that of a sub-prime mortgage lender specializing in Stockton real estate. When she learned about the exchange rate decision, she asked if she could start to borrow in Euros, put the money in a local bank and use the interest she earns, as well as any exchange rate gains, to pay back her earlier debt. A creative variant on the US Treasury Department approach.



Claire has the financial behavior of a child of the Great Depression. Since she began receiving allowance (5 years ago), she's spent a total of $2.35. She's been looking into buying a small island off the coast of Belize. When she was told about the allowance arrangement, she looked at me suspiciously. "Sounds too good to be true. I'll need a full accounting to run by my team. Of course, I assume you'll absorb the financial impact of any adverse tax effects."



Erin has the financial curiosity of P.Diddy. Surrounded at all times by an adoring posse, she is blissfully unaware of how much money she has. When the check comes, she goes to the lady's room while someone else pays the bills. Luckily, her people can be trusted.